Love

Love is not blind anymore

‘Men are often threatened by the success, salary and popularity of their women’

She is a model, a VJ, an actress and a Page 3 socialite. She has featured in a few music videos and is also a keen theatre enthusiast and will be soon seen in Gary Richardson and Alyque Padamsee’s play. She has hosted a lot of live shows and now has a film in the pipeline. But the role Pooja Mishra is enjoying right now is that of a ‘confidante’ on a talk show Jab We Talk which she is hosting. She says ‘A friend in need is a friend indeed’ is her tagline on the show. In the hot seat, the sizzling diva answers phone-in questions from viewers on love problems, depression, loneliness, etc. “Every second caller wants to date me,” she giggles when we ask her about the feedback she gets on the show. “I call it the psychic hotline,” she says. Mastii-Kustii caught up with her recently and asked her questions on love, marriage and relationships...

On love:
In love, chemistry is more important than physics. The adage, ‘love is blind’ does not work today. Compatibility between the two partners is an important factor. Love happens when both the partners are soul mates. There should be no expectations in love and even if there are, your mate will know even without you telling him/her about it.

On live-in:
Live-in relationships are healthy because you can discover each other to the core. Sometimes when you are in love you don’t know much about the other person, the habits, the likes and dislikes, etc. So a streamlined live-in relationship is quite okay.

On marriage:
If there is a good companionship between two people and if it is magical enough then there’s a transition from friendship to marriage. In recent times, everybody wants to live independently. Today marriage is about partnership and equality. Every relationship is a two-way street — you can’t walk on it alone — both should walk together.

On divorce:
Marriages which don’t find a balance between partnership and equality tend to break. But yes, it’s better to be divorced than to live in a sinking relationship.
After all, we have just one life to live and we need to live it well. In cases where kids are involved, it is the duty of parents to make sure that the kids are taken care of and their future is not tampered with. Divorce should not leave an imprint on the child’s mind. They shouldn’t feel that they didn’t have a nourishing childhood or feel a lack of something in their lives.

On men:
Men are threatened by success, salary and popularity of women. So the ego problems creep into a relationship. There are also men who fall into the commitment-phobic variety. Men today like to be jugglers — they juggle four to five women at the same time. They at most times suffer from insecurity. Men should learn to be more generous, more giving, more positive and more motivating.

On women:
Women should be more independent. They should delegate responsibilities equally with the partner rather than doing everything on their own. They should not get carried away by their emotion. They need to enjoy their life, take time out for themselves. They need to plan and organize their life and understand that they too deserve all the fun in their life. Everybody should learn to live a well-rounded compre